Somehow a few years slipped by without any updates to my site. First my life was just busy. Busy with new hoop gigs and retreats. I even traveled to the other side of the globe to attend the Sacred Circularities Hoop Retreat in 2014.
Soon after my life was severely disrupted by the beginnings of acute environmental illness in the form of serious hyper sensitivity to electromagnetic fields (AKA ‘EHS’ short for ‘Electro Hyper Sensitivity’) and severe sensitivity/reactivity to chemicals including fragrances (AKA ‘MCS’ for ‘Multiple Chemical Sensitivity’). EHS and MCS are basically two sides of the same illness, a hyper sensitivity to man made environmental toxins.
I don’t care for labels typically and I had tried at first to distance myself from categorizing the physical pain I was in. I didn’t want to placed into a category, open to judgment and labeling. However ultimately I had to use these labels in order to explain my condition to others. EI (another label, one for Environmental Illness that encompasses disorders like MCS and EHS) is a disability. And I have found it in fact to be incredibly disabling. Trying to live in a world when you suddenly become ‘allergic’ (only easy way to describe it) to Wifi, cell phones, and cell towers (to name a few sources of triggers for my symptoms) is more than disabling. It’s near to impossible.
I first tried to cope. Tried a lot of alternative medicines and devices all purporting to cure my disorder. But the only thing that ever seemed to help was to get away from it. When we went camping in the woods in Shenandoah national park where there were no radio frequencies or even electricity, I felt 100 percent better. I felt like myself again. I felt at peace and happy. And most importantly I felt free from debilitating symptoms like chronic headaches, migraines, chest pain, electrical shock waves in my hands and arms (mainly just when touching cell phones and some other electronic devices) difficulties sleeping, concentrating, speaking, etc.
Half a year passed with my symptoms getting worse. It seemed the only thing to do was to try and find a place away from everything that was making me feel so terrible. Fortunately I have had a loving partner on my journey who agreed to relocate with me. We searched at first close to home thinking there must be a place outside of the city that would work. But it turned out that every mile there was another cell tower and houses had smart meters and chemical fumes or molds or were simply unaffordable. We broadened our search to include other states finally honing in on the South West and on Arizona. We found others with the same condition living in this part of the country, improving in their health as a result. And although the same EMF pollution exists from the wireless industry in this part of the country, with the lower population density and larger wilderness areas, there are some places left free of RF (radio frequency) interference (otherwise known as a ‘white zone’).
I have always preferred seaside places, my love of the ocean and water in general being great. So transitioning to the harshness of the desert landscape hasn’t been easy but it’s been rewarding. In an unlikely place such as the wilderness area we have found to call home (for now at least) I have found relief and healing.
More than relief from my current EI (Environmental Illness) I have been able to get more in touch with other inner needs that weren’t getting met in the fast paced, noisy, overcrowded, polluted city. I have found relief from the distractions of crowds, traffic, shopping malls, ‘night life’, and all of the techno gadgets, the new toys of our modern age (toys I have discovered that can have devastating consequences to health and our mental well being, but more on that another time).
Here I can truly connect with myself and nature. I have space for contemplation and rest. And also space to connect with other energies, the more subtle ones found in the nature world. Ones I am free to connect with now that louder man made energies are out of the way.
It’s been a difficult journey. I have been forced to make extreme changes. Pain was my motivator. So often we seem to need something drastic, something painful in order to change. I wish it wasn’t this way. That I could make positive changes for myself without having to be forced into in this manner. But I think this is typical of human nature. That we are mainly only motivated to really take action when our hand is forced.
I have been in the desert a year and have learned so many things, I can’t begin to relate them all here now. But I wanted to finally begin. To reach out and share my story. And with this disruption it has taken time to reorganize and pick up where I left off with my hoop practice. I had, with the help of my partner, Sam (a brilliant film/video maker) started creating a lot of fun videos, but haven’t posted any of them yet as they remain unfinished, waiting for us to be more settled and have more time to devote.
I am hopeful that I will be able to share some more videos with you soon. In the meantime I will be working on posting ‘new’ photos (from the last few years when I wasn’t able to post). So please stay tuned. I haven’t forgotten you!
PS- In these photos I am wearing a new pair of ballet slipper style moccasins from ‘Into the Wild Way’ an amazing shop I found on Etsy. Just loving them! Ordered another pair in a different style, coming soon. (See link for the shop and website in my links section sidebar). Also really helpful for grounding which has been one of the things that has helped with my electro sensitivity the most!